And that is when I knew, I had to either demand couples counseling (for the millionth time) or I had to get a divorce.

I didn’t want a divorce. I REALLY did not want a divorce.  

I knew the financial and emotional challenges that a divorce may bring. 

I knew the hardships a divorce may have on children.

I was ‘ugly crying with tears down my face,’ level of afraid. 

I was afraid for my kids. I was afraid for my husband. I was afraid for myself. 

We tried two different marriage counselors over two very long years, but nothing seemed to work.

We had to either suck-it-up and be miserable for the rest of our lives or we could set each other free.

Free from not being enough for my husband. Free from feeling like a failure…

Luckily for us, I knew how to lead us through a fair divorce process that the lawyers couldn’t muck up. 

I do it for my clients every day. 

I could take us through a compassionate process where both our financial, parental, and emotional needs were addressed. 

And that is exactly what I did.

It was hard and it was emotionally taxing, but…

It was so much easier than those who lawyer-up, break the 401k to pay for the divorce, and use their kids as weapons.

Those on the scary path of divorce must choose their path… either a litigated divorce or a mediated divorce.

We wanted more for ourselves and our kids than the traditional divorce litigation model offered.

I was lucky that my husband and I agreed that we wanted a fair resolution and we wanted to do what was best for our kids.

We got off the rollercoaster of chaos and…

We chose fairness over pettiness. We chose OUR decision-making abilities over bill-by-the-hour attorneys. We chose happiness over resentment. 

That single choice of mediating our divorce and not litigating our divorce made all the difference in the world.

We now live a life where my children feel loved and secure and we are both financially independent. We even laugh with each other about our crazy kids… at least once a week.